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Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Message in a Bottle # 13

Planes Trains and Buses

4th September 2009


On the top of a mountain in the wild jungle of Borneo the Gallant Captain Ganghook sits and looks down over the low valleys and deep river where More Magic lays peacefully at anchor with the Buxom Wench aboard preparing a feast for his return.

Ganghook has had a very prosperous few months, since leaving the crystal clear waters of Tioman Island the crew have ventured up the spice rich coast of East Malaysia, devouring all that dare to come before them, not an island has been left untouched, Ganghook and his Wench have left their mark, as far north as The Perenthian Islands where the back packers are fierce and the music is booming, to Terengganu where all the Mosques are tiled with the most exotic jewels and reflect the sun for as far as the eye can see.
Ah but the sea is not enough for the adventurous crew of More Magic, they must see more, learn more, Trains, planes and buses await, for there is more than one way to conquer the vast lands of Asia.
Ganghook, the Wench & the trusty ships Rat “Cheese” take to the skies. From Terengganu to Kuala Lumpur, Bangkok then a over night train trip (and oh what a train trip, perhaps the Wench is better suited to the high seas or perhaps a crate of Rum would help ease the journey!) to Chiang Mai, in Northern Thailand home of the Asian Elephant, now most loved animal of the Wench, “Oh Captain, every ship needs an Elephant” she proclaims after spending a most exciting day playing in the rivers with these wondrously genteel animals. “Nay” the Captain replays “with all the shoes and handbags, there is not room at the inn for such a beast a rat shall be your lot” http://www.elephantnaturepark.org .
Before leaving Chiang Mai a must do is to visit the Chiang Mai Zoo, for there are many exotic creatures roaming the grounds, from Hippo’s to Papa Bear (Proud father of the Panda) and you may even catch a White Tiger there.

5 days and 5 nights are enjoyed plundering the back streets and alley ways of Chiang Mai, food and fabric galore; not to mention the hundreds of WATS,” What is a Wat you may well ask?” Temples, Wats and Pagoda’s they are all the same just a different language, Yes it is true, Thailand is abundant with these glistening gold leaf monuments. Oh the Wench is in heaven, market upon market, alas though it is the Captain who buys the shoes, (Tis a plot to keep the elephant off the ship!!!!).
From Chiang Mai on to Chiangrai they relax in style on Malaysia’s Deluxe Coach lines, take in the Magic sites of rice paddies and tranquil beauty that Northern Thailand is famous for.
From Chiangrai a car is hired to drive through the steep climbing mountain roads to Maisalong, home of the Hill tribe people, and the beginning of the Golden Triangle, there is no evidence of opium grown here now days, Tea and tourism has taken its place. A night is spent in the fresh mountain air overlooking the Burmese border before the traveler’s head off once again back down the slopes towards Chiangrai.

Chiangrai is the site of the most Magnificent Wat Rong Khun www.watrongkhun.com a feast for the eyes of all who see.


The brave captain & crew journeyed along on the local bus, now how many Thais can you fit on a bus, I think we finally found the answer, on boxes and floors 5 to a 2 person seat this was a real up close and personal trip, never the less the fearless crew rose to the challenge and disembarked in the planned location with just a few minor knocks and bumps.

Another highlight in Chiangrai is the Town Clock Tower, created by the same artist as the Wat Rong Khun) twice each night there is a cacophony of color and sound, changing from yellow to red to purple, the whole show lasts around 10mins and the traffic is still going around the roundabout, business as usual whilst we brave sailors capture the show on our cameras.

Alas it is well known that a pirate’s life is unpredictable and these pirates must cut the trip short and rush back to the good ship, then on to home lands as there are attempts of plundering happening on the home shores. Ganghook’s treasures must be protected at all costs.

A quick trip on the big silver bird returns the sailors once more to the good ship MMagic and it is time to set sail, for the Wild Men of Borneo are calling.

Sunday, January 18, 2009

Message in a Bottle # 12










Pirates held Captive in Malaysia


Will Gang hook and The Buxom Wench survive the Malaysian gallows????????

“Nay”
screamed the Head of Immigration and Malaysian law,

"throw them to the sharks. We have been searching for these pirates for 24 moons or more, now we have them in our grasp, we shall throw them in the dungeons and chuck away the key."

Thirty days of hard labor and toil, 30 nights of drunken debauchery,” work hard, play harder” says the tireless captain; “we shall take all we can from this land of Siam, no Chandler nor shipwright, shall be left unscathed.” For on the morn of the 30th day of the 7th moon we shall make haste to Malaysian waters with our sea chests full and bootie aplenty.

So once again the handsome Ganghook, together with the Buxom Wench and their faithful crew set sail for Langkawi leaving the plundered shores of Phuket behind.
A 90 day holiday in is granted. The Captain has declared; No plundering, No pirating, for even the hardiest of pirates tire. Oh what joy; oh what fun the lusty wench sighs," we shall shop, we shall dine in the finest restaurants Malaysia has to offer, we shall explore the inland sights." Breathlessly she prepares for unknown adventures.

Ten days of idyllic cruising the exotic islands around Langkawi, crystal clear waters, white sandy beaches. A life of Riley. Simple pleasures of frozen Margarita’s at sunset, seafood delicacies on the shore and lazy mornings in the sun. Ah but enough of this! Malaysia has more to offer, a shopping spree is next on the holiday hit list and so Penang is the next port of call.
Unbeknown to all, the captain has developed a shoe fetish, or has he grown more feet? His foot locker has expanded with;
  • four more pairs of shoes,
  • eight check shirts,
  • three pairs of shorts,
  • two new hats
  • and a nice new handbag for me!

So what can a girl do, with a new handbag, one needs to accessorizes so accessorize she does. Shop till you drop is the chant, Save on the bargains. Live for now and pay tomorrow. Oh we just love those little plastic thingies!
Now the business part of the holiday is done and dusted a bit of back to nature is required by the Captain. He has decided that he is going to treat his beauty to one of the natural wonders of the world. Taman Negara, the first and largest national park Malaysia has to offer. A show case of nature, a step back in time, fourteen fun filled nights listening to the sounds of silence!

His dream
! Her nightmare! The Wench still doesn’t do bush. Trekking through the jungle, a watchful eye out for tigers, another for elephants, and yet another eye out for snakes. So many eyes a girl needs. The trekkers hear stories of the great white tiger, and the small but dangerous Malaysian jungle elephants. But alas; they have seen none.
Not is all lost in the captain’s mind. There are mountains to be climbed, snakes to be photographed and leaches galore. He is in his element. "Yet another element, the wench" adds ruefully. The Buxom Wench has been reduced to a disheveled wreck. Weak from a lack of blood, caused by the excessive thirst of the leaches, which together with the bite of the mosquito take their wretched toll? The two intrepid travelers must climb to the high grounds to escape the blood thirsty locals.

Finally, exhausted and weary, with pillows, wheelie backpacks, books and bandages the holiday makers board the bus headed for The Cameron Highlands, the Steam boat capital of Malaysia. Once at Fathers Guest house R&R is the order of the stay. A few gentle walks around the town, Tea for Two, (This is Tea growing country) bellies full of fresh F&V, back on track the two are ready to return to the good ship More Magic. Once more on board, the crew becomes restless and the call of the sea beckons. Crates of Rum and the finest wine are loaded. Ganghook and the Wench dressed to kill, approach the authorities. Ah, but alak and alas, the two are held captive by the Malaysian Immigration officers, for they have overstayed their welcome. Three months is apparently three days more than the 90 days granted.
Oh what a blunder!!!!!

For 6 torturous hot hours they are held in detention, subjected to ancient forms of interrogation, and finally forced to surrender their passports. All is not well, the ship lays at anchor the faithful crew on board waiting for their Captain and Wench to return, this can’t be happening, this just can’t happen!
The Handsome Captain and his beauty devise a plan, bribery and corruption is not dead,nothing and no-one can keep the Captain at bay for long.Finally, with papers and passports in order a hasty getaway is made and they leave Malaysian waters.
North we go once again. Take me to Thailand……, Burma, ………, or India.
Anywhere as long as it is far far away...